So... here are the players:
- There's me
- Angela works for me. She's also my friend.
- Erin is Angela's roommate.
Here's some backstory:
Angela just recently moved into a new apartment with her new roommate Erin. Erin is a cute, petite little redhead. Erin is just the type of girl who I normally find attractive. Just about everyone who really knows me knows "my type."
Angela and I work together anywhere from 4-5 days per week. She's dedicated to her work and very caring towards our employees. Since we spend plenty of time around each other, we both just naturallly discuss whatever's going on in our lives. Like I said, we're friends.
Angela, Erin, and I have also hung out a few times together. All of these situations have centered around having a drink or going to a party. I feel as if we've all had fun together, and that there's been no real problems in that dynamic (well, except for maybe getting left behind in Georgetown).
Anyways, I do find Erin attractive and have mentioned it to Angela a few times. Being my normal pessimistic (is it pessimist or realist?) self, I never thought that it was possible that Erin might be interested in me. BUT, we do have fun when we hang out.
So, here's what happened this weekend:
Angela invited me to a house-warming party that she and her roommate threw this past Saturday. I went and had a decent time. Up until it got late, I really didn't talk to too many people, mainly because I didn't know that many of the people there. But, I was enjoying myself and had a few beers. I did speak to Angela for a while, and only sporadically with Erin. Erin seemed to be spending the majority of her time entertaining her sisters and the guests with whom she works. Oh yeah, she also spent a good little amount of time chatting with "Kip", the guy she's sort of seeing.
Well, it seemed like all at once, all of Erin's workmates left, and about an hour later, Kip and pals left. Erin then began paying attention to me. I don't know if she only was interested in me because the others were gone, or if she no longer needed to be a gracious host, or what. But we hung out and talked for a good little bit.
She asked me to go out on their balcony with her while she smoked, and I didn't go. So when she returned she asked me to fix her a drink and I did. Eventually, Angela's friends from Norfolk arrived and we all began to play a drinking game. After the first round, people needed to refresh their drinks and smoke. Erin asked me to come outside with her while she smoked, and this time I did go out. I "leaned up against the balcony rail" next to her and chatted with her while she smoked. And then Erin literally ducked under my arms eased her way into my arms.
We continued chatting, and she was either fishing for compliments or is really insecure about being a redhead with freckles. Obviously, I don't find redheads with freckles unattractive, and continued to tell her that. I DIDN'T mention to her that I absolutely love redheads. Anyway, at some point in our chat, she kissed me on the cheek. And we chatted some more. And then she wanted to go back inside (it was getting cold, and we wanted another drink). So she kissed me on the cheek again. And I told her that if she kissed me "for real", I'd fix her another drink. And then we kissed. It was nice, but I didn't try to force her into anything, and didn't even try to french kiss her.
All of the time we were outside, the rest of the party had gone back inside and were playing cards again. I really didn't want to do too much more drinking because I had to drive home, so I didn't try to get back into the game. Erin and I chatted some more and eventually went back outside for her to smoke again. This time, I wrapped my arms around her and didn't even try to kiss her. Apparently we stayed out there chatting for about 25 minutes or so, and then came back in. I think I fixed her a final drink and sat down on a chair. She works herself into the same chair as me (and again manages to get my arm around her), and slowly passes out.
After a little bit of just sitting there with her asleep on my chest, I realize that it's after 4 in the morning. I get up to go to the bathroom, and then get ready to leave. And then ...
And then, Angela confronts me. She tells me that I only want to leave because Erin had passed out. And that she felt that I didn't want to be hanging around her or her friends. I assured her that wasn't the case. And I walk outside into the hallway with Angela... and then things got wierd.
Angela starts to tell me that she believed I only came over to their party to see Erin. And then she started rambling...
She said something about "maybe it's because we spend so much time around each other", and that "I'm her boss". And she kind of continued to chastise me about hanging out with Erin, and that we were friends. She mentioned that she's told Erin about me being semi-interested in her. And Angela got wierd saying that she had had wierd dreams about me for the past 3 nights... And then she asks me not to sleep with her roommate, that it would be too awkward. This reallly wierded me out. She then asks that things not be awkward at work on Monday. I tell her that it will only be awkward if she lets it get awkward.
Here are my questions:
- I really am attracted to Erin, but wonder if her "attraction for me" that night was alcohol induced or a matter of convenience or genuine?
- How can I know how Erin feels if Angela's going to feel awkward about it?
- I feel as if Angela likes me and is jealous that I'm interested in Erin... is that right?
- Am I an insensitive bad friend if I do try to pursue Erin?
- or Is Angela selfish by asking me not to pursue Erin?
I don't want to hurt Angela... she is my friend.... AND I have to work with her. BUT, I'd really like to find out what's behind Erin's actions at her party... if she's interested. And if she is, I'd like to get to know her better and see if we could get along. What can I do?
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